That annoying moment when your mom compares you to another kid and she has no idea how much worst they are than you.
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Pick a facebook status
Kicking the ice under the fridge just because you`re too lazy to pick it up.
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If I was a teacher I would create a multiple choice test where all 30 answers are "A" and giggle while the kids freak out..
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A jealous woman does better research than the FBI.
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Am I the only one who closes the silverware drawer with an epic pelvic thrust?
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If I`m attracted to you, I`ll probably act awkward around you.
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Dear person reading this, I could be naked right now and you would never know
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Actually no, my status/tweet wasn`t aimed at you, but hey, if the shoe fits, feel free to wear it. Hoe.
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Today, I lost my mood ring. I`m not sure how I feel about that...
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No, I don`t have anything on my phone, but i don`t like people going through my stuff.
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